It had been a regular day at University.  Which considering where Rin went to school- was the first sign of the apocalypse.  No seriously-the Apocalypse. What possessed her to go to school in Gotham she would never know.  At least the University was in the nicer part of Gotham although that wasn’t saying much.  It had probably been insanity.  What does a white girl from the suburbs of Ohio know about big city life?  Especially city life in a place like Gotham!

            Her mother had warned her. Actually both her parents had warned her.  And her sister, both aunts, heck even her second cousin twice removed.  But no- despite its location Gotham U had one of the best language programs in the country.  She had a passion for Japanese and wanted to go somewhere and really learn it.  Plus it had a great writing program for her minor.  All of which she could have found at both the other colleges her parents suggested and the Christian schools she had considered.

            If she lived through this she was going to start trying harder to get to church.  That’s right, she promised, no more ‘I’m too tired’ or ‘I don’t feel good’.  Getting out of this would be a miracle even if she did have a card-carrying member of the spandex club with her.  He had quite the glare or she would have asked the burning question on everyone’s mind “How often did you people watch Richard Simmons tapes before you came up with those outfits?”

            Anyway it had all started in Chemistry class.  Why she had to take chemistry with her major she still couldn’t figure out.  How many times was she going to be asked the chemical composition of Hydrochloric acid?  What did these people think happened during casual conversation? ‘Could you pass me the salt and by the way I was wondering what is actually in Hydrochloric acid?’

She was a bright woman, although she’d never be a Rhodes Scholar but this class made her look like an idiot.  Well if she was being honest it was less the class and more her lab partner, Dick Grayson.  Much to the consternation of her female classmates she was the one who got the paired with him.  Dick Grayson had been on People’s most eligible bachelor list along with his former guardian Bruce Wayne since he turned 18.  He was handsome, rich and intelligent. And despite having been his lab partner for half a semester- he still made her tongue-tied.  And let’s face it, what guy is attracted to lines like ‘Could you please pass the beaker?’ ‘Is the temperature at 400 degrees yet?’ or most often ‘Do you want to observe and record the reactions this time?’

And now this!  For some reason she couldn’t fathom a supervillian had attacked her chemistry class.  Normally, she would have welcomed the chance to get out of her biweekly ritual of embarrassment. However, instead of escaping when she could, like an idiot she had searched for her lab partner. By the time she had realized he’d probably escaped with the rest of the smart people she’d been taken hostage.  

As if that wasn’t bad enough when one of those superheroes had shown up she’d been used as leverage and they had both ended up here. Locked in the classroom’s chemical supply room.  And when she said room she meant more like a closet.  Needing to say something or go crazy she asked, “Why do they call this a room anyway?”

From the look she received he both didn’t care and wasn’t following her train of thought.  She continued anyway, “No I’m serious. This is more the size of a small walk-in closet at most.  Why not just call it a chemical supply closet?” What a time for her shyness to leave and her big mouth to kick in!

Obviously annoyed, he replied, “Do you mind being quiet?  I’m trying to find a way to get us out.” She was amazed at how much emotion he was able to convey with that silly mask on.  She racked her mind to try to remember what his name was supposed to be.  Something with birds perhaps? Bluebird? Nightingale? Nightbird?

She waited while he inspected the door and room.  Presumably he was checking for escape routes, but he better stop looking contemplatively at the air duct.  She may not be fat but there was no way she’d be able to fit through that.  When he spun around and looked at her she winced, “I said that out loud didn’t I?”

“I’d answer that, but I’m told talking to women about their weight is dangerous.”  His grin was kind of familiar.  Which probably meant that she was becoming delusional or something. I mean from _Ohio_ here people!  Where would she run into what’s his name there?  An Ohio State vs Michigan game that got out of hand?  Trying to stifle her amusement at the idea of her spandex clad companion policing a college football game, she asked, “So any ideas?”

“Ideas?” He asked, obviously confused. Oh yeah, they were talking about her weight a second ago.  An attention span; she really needed to get one. Perhaps they’d have a sale for one somewhere when she got out of here.  Realizing she’d mentally strayed again, she said, “You know, ideas, for our escape?”

Whatever he was going to reply was cut off from the sound of gunshots from outside.  Oh, great she was going to die! She thought hysterically.  Somehow it hadn’t seemed real before now.  Everything had happened so fast!  But this was it. She was going to die in a chemical supply closet with a Richard Simmons reject.  He was a hot Richard Simmons reject-but that didn’t change anything.  Her thoughts whirled as she became more and more frightened.

When the door finally did open she was hyperventilating.   This was it, the end of her life.  When it opened fully and the Batman loomed, she squeaked “I never thought the grim reaper wore his underwear on top of his pants.”

And then she promptly fainted.
~The End~